In honor of everybody's fourth favorite holiday, I wanted to talk a
little bit about everyone's seventh favorite horror movie franchise.
That's right!
Leprechaun! A name so scary that I constantly have to check the
spelling every time I type it.
Now,
Leprechaun
lives in a very special place in my heart. This was the first horror
movie I ever saw (I was seven, and my cool aunt was babysitting me). I
loved the horror. I loved the humor. I loved seeing Jennifer Aniston
embarrass herself. It was a blast from start to finish.
Because today is St. Patrick's Day, here's a very special look back at the
Leprechaun franchise.
The first
Leprechaun
is very low budget. The whole thing takes place in a farmhouse in the
one area of "North Dakota" that looks exactly like Southern California.
It's probably most famous for having Jennifer Aniston in it, but Warwick
Davis is really the star here. It's a neat little roller coaster of a
movie, with one of the all time best moster-kill catchphrases of all
time... AND there's murder-by-pogo-stick!
Leprechaun 2
takes our titular monster to Hollywood, where he uses a cappuccino
machine to murder that guy from MadTV that reminded everybody of Will
Ferrell. I think you know who I'm talking about. Whatever happened to
that guy? He probably still works. Anyway, the movie is the most
forgettable entry in the franchise, but it's fun. And there's a kiss
scene with a giant fake tongue that is truly horrifying.
Leprechaun 3
(the one in Vegas) is pretty much the consensus pick for the best in
the franchise. It's funny, there's some gnarly special effects (a magic
trick gone wrong, an inexplicable robot lady, the umbrella scene...),
and the script is chock-full of dirty limericks. It's my personal
favorite.
Leprechaun 4: In Space
is the wackiest of the bunch. It's almost as fun as part 3, but it also
tries a little too hard. The movie starts with a really gross shout-out
to the chest-burster scene from Alien, and it never lets up from there.
There's a giant spider mutant, a space princess with magical healing
powers, and some pretty great death scenes. No limericks, though.
People like the idea of
Leprechaun: In the Hood
more than the actual film. It's a great premise, and Ice-T is having a
blast, but it's just not that fun. There are moments, though. Coolio has
the most random cameo in the history of cinema, and the whole thing
ends with a glorious rap song that Warwick Davis can barely get through.
Leprechaun: Back 2 tha Hood
is cheaper, dumber, and a whole lot more fun than his first trip to the
hood. This is the first time the franchise has repeated itself, though.
I would've much preferred its original concept (Leprechaun Does Spring
Break), but the execution isn't bad, and its climactic scenes are some
of the best in the series. There's a lot of dumb drug humor, so that's
always fun.
And now we come to the nadir of the series: the sullen, dull "re-imagining" known as
Leprechaun Origins.
Instead of a horror comedy starring a little person actor who is
clearly having the time of his life, we get a straight-up horror
survival story starring a WWE wrestler who has zero lines and about ten
seconds of screen time in the whole movie. Wikipedia says that WWE is
currently working on a sequel, which I will watch because I'm a movie
masochist, but eek. This is bad.
Rather
than ending on such a down note, I wanted to share a little factoid
that I just found out. Apparently in Irish mythology, there are
leprechauns and
clurichauns.
Clurichauns are basically the same thing as leprechauns, but they only
come out at night, they're constantly drunk, and they enjoy riding
sheep. If you treat them well, they'll protect your wine cellars.
God, I love the Irish.
Happy St. Patrick's Day, everybody!
